IMNOTQUITEJACK

Sea Wolf: good music, awesome album cover.

Sea Wolf: good music, awesome album cover.

My friends are awesome.

My friends are awesome.

This is the eye of a gigantic storm on Saturn that is larger than earth.

This is the eye of a gigantic storm on Saturn that is larger than earth.

(Source: christansummers)

(Source: fyerflys.com, via thedailygrit)

My own name crystal - thanks Atlantis!

My own name crystal - thanks Atlantis!

The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is. George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman

The Paradoxical Commandments

By Dr. Kent M. Keith

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway. 

Appeasing the Hostage Takers

When visiting friends, I am notorious for leaving my clothes behind.  Despite my stubborn determination to stop doing this, it happened again last weekend when I left my coat behind at a vacation house.  After a day or two, I was contacted by the shadowy group that was holding my coat hostage.  An anonymous e-mail arrived with a brief message:

And then, later that day:

Interesting… Then:

I had no choice but to comply with this totally unreasonable request.  Chris, a nice waiter at Melting Pot helped me out.  (He preferred the arms-under hugging position.)

I hoped that this would appease the hostage takers.

Excellent!  I can practically feel the angel-soft microsuede of my beloved coat back in my arms.

Hug a MAILBOX?  How could I possibly comply?  I don’t have a mailbox!  In a panic, I ran through the streets of Concord, MA desperately searching for help.  Thank the sweet lord, I came upon a post office where some very nice women took my picture:

You’ll notice that I’m wearing my backup coat in this picture.

These bastards aren’t easy to please…

YES!  The Exchange would be imminent.  That same night, I was blindfolded and led to a dark room where I handed over a package of Hershey’s Hugs.  At long last, I got my beloved brown coat back, completely unharmed.  I’ll never again leave an article of clothing behind!